Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation

Dustin: 3.5 of 5 stars Nick: 3.5 of 5 stars Average: 3.5 of 5 stars (Live canary)

Dustin: Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation is about International Monetary Fund secret agent Tom Cruise, who must circumnavigate the globe for action to happen. Director Christopher McQuarrie said, “Action!” and action just happened. Some action leads to other action. The plot was almost as hard to follow as Incoherent Vice. I can explain the overall story, but I had a hard time following it, not always sure why we were in a new location, what Tom Cruise was trying to accomplish during the underwater level.

Nick: Hunt (hard H sound) went to those new locations because that is where the Syndicate would be on their next mission. The underwater scene was pretty silly. They have all this tactical armor, but they don’t have a piece of equipment to help extend your stay underwater? But it was fun…

Dustin: The movie was basically about Tom Cruise trying to prove the existence of a secret organization, the specter-like Syndicate. He teams up with an MI6 agent who is under deep cover within the Syndicate, and together they are trying to destroy it.

I guess I shouldn’t complain about realism in a movie like this, but I was wondering what a British guy (Simon Pegg) was doing working at CIA headquarters. This wasn’t a comedy like Spy, where you could overlook Jason Statham’s presence there. I also laughed when Alec Baldwin criticised the IMF for doing the sort of things the CIA does.

Nick: I recently showed Team America: World Police to someone who had never even heard of the movie! Alec Baldwin’s pleas to the council reminded me of one of Alec Baldwin’s many speeches in TA:WP. In other words I laughed whenever he was on screen.  

Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol was such a fantastic action film it’s hard not to compare this semi-lacklustre film to its predecessor. I don’t think any aspect of the film is equal to or better than M:I-GP. There was a great comedy bit of Tom Cruise being forced into action after being dead for a minute. He is forced to drive a car in a high speed pursuit but keeps crashing into everything as Simon Pegg sits shotgun freaking out about the whole situation. Immediately after the car chase, Hunt jumps onto a motorcycle and is able to ride it without fault, and although it was a very entertaining scene I’m a little wary about the amount of sense it makes. Wouldn’t he still be a shitty driver but on a much more dangerous vehicle?

Did that make sense? I haven’t had my coffee yet

Dustin: Makes more sense than the movie.

The reason huge stars like Cruise are cast in movies like these is because we’re supposed to think this is happening to Tom Cruise--it doesn’t matter what the character’s name is--and therefore we’re supposed to care more.

Having said that, I actually like Tom Cruise. He certainly gets a lot of undeserved hate for jumping on Oprah’s couch 10 years ago. It’s hard to believe he’s 53. I’m 21 years younger than him, but my body more closely resembles a 53-year-old’s, while his looks more like mine in my mid-20s (feels so long ago). He also has a young face. I think he could continue being action man for a few more years. I wouldn’t say he has a wide range, though. He’s always Tom Cruise (except for his brilliant role in Tropic Thunder).

Nick: I actually loved it when he jumped on that couch because celebrities normally have PR people to control them, but he was like, Fuck it, I’m jumping on this goddamn couch! Interviews with celebs are often boring, simple answers that make the celeb more endearing, but not that interview--it still gets brought up 10 years after the incident. That’s pretty crazy!

I was kind of upset about Jeremy Renner’s whittled down role. He was awesome in the last one and his character’s story was great, but here he seems like Hawkeye: a pretty useless member of the team.

Dustin: Like you said, the movie was pretty fun. It reminded me of a Pierce Brosnan-era Bond film. A little over-the-top and contrived, but chock-full of imaginative action set-pieces.